To be me... or to be liked
I feel like it's me against the world. I feel like in being open about who I am, I've made an enemy of nearly everyone in my life. I've always stayed to myself, not made a big deal about the issues I care about, and basically let anyone around me walk all over me. I didn't stand up for myself or my beliefs, and it always left me feeling so small.
I've had so many people who were close to me get upset with me for not standing up for myself. I'm in a constant tug of war between trying to keep the peace and not being a pushover.
I decided I have to stand up for myself. Why keep my mouth shut for the sake of others if they're not going to give me the same consideration?
Well here I am, standing up for myself, and feeling like I've turned nearly everyone against me.
I stood up to my neighbor and now not only is he making me miserable, but I'm pretty sure he's got the guy across the street in on it.
I stood up to my grandfather, and spent a family cookout yesterday feeling even more like an outcast with my family than normal. My mom and my sister treat me as though I'm a ticking time bomb.
So where's the happy medium? How to I please everyone, instead of myself? Well obviously you can't please everyone... how do I keep them from hating me? Maybe I don't. Maybe there is no happy medium. The question is, am I okay with that?
I really don't know.
Photo by Sasha Freemind on Unsplash