Sexual Abuse

This has been weighing pretty heavily on my mind lately. I’ve kept my mouth shut for decades because I didn’t think it was worth mentioning. With all the sexual harassment allegations flying around, and so many people saying they’re being blown out of proportion or defending the abusers, I just can’t keep quiet anymore. Seems as though I’m losing the ability to keep my mouth shut about a lot these days!
When I was in high school, before I got my drivers license, there was a boy on the bus who I considered my friend. He started making comments, pretty much daily, about my breasts. Sure, he was joking and meant no harm. But he didn’t think about how I might feel about the comments. I’d always change the subject. Being the non confrontational shy gal I’ve always been, I couldn’t just come right out and say he was making me uncomfortable. 
Then there was the boy at work – this would probably have been my senior year of high school – who started commenting on my breasts, and then actually groped them one night when we were both closing. Again, I walked away and kept my distance, but couldn’t bring myself to say anything. These aren’t the only times this has happened, but they’re the times that stick out in my head because they involved people who were supposed to be my friends.

If you know me at all in real life, you know I have large breasts. I’m so self conscious about them. I’m always pulling at my shirt to make sure they’re covered. These instances of guys harassing me have made me feel that way. I even had a breast reduction surgery to make them smaller, though Mother Nature made sure they’re still prominent.

So, all these women coming out years later and calling out men who have harassed them? I get it. I’ve been there. (And comparatively, my experiences weren’t *that* bad.) It messes with your head in a way you can’t possibly understand if you haven’t experienced it. So maybe instead of judging them, you should judge the men who think it’s okay to say what they want or touch women how they want. Judge the men who think they can just grab a woman by the pussy (yes, I’m talking about that one.) Because it’s not okay, and I’m so glad women are finally stepping up and making it known.

Also for the love of god, if a girl says no – whether she be a friend, girlfriend, or wife, it fucking means no and you deserve whatever you get if you don’t stop.


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